Real Men. Real Experiences. Real Lessons.
Abuse can feel invisible. It can make you doubt yourself, question what’s happening, and feel like you’re the only one trapped in that reality. But these stories show it isn’t rare. Men across the UK are living with coercive control, emotional abuse, parental alienation, and in some cases, physical harm — and their voices are being heard. At SoulForge, we believe in shining a light on these experiences because you are not alone, and your experience matters.
Richard — Twenty Years of Hidden Abuse
Richard’s life looked normal to friends and colleagues: a family, a steady job, a home. But for two decades, he endured constant emotional and physical abuse from his wife. He kept quiet, feared disbelief, and felt trapped. Only by secretly documenting incidents and seeking outside support did he gain the clarity to take action. The documentary My Wife, My Abuser brought his story to a national audience, showing that long-term abuse against men is real, often invisible, and profoundly damaging.
Northern Ireland Male Victim — Speaking Out
A man in Northern Ireland bravely shared his story with ITV News after enduring controlling behaviour and harassment. He described hiding bruises from his children and pretending injuries were accidents, while trying to maintain his role as a father. Police reports show thousands of similar male victims across Northern Ireland, yet many delay reporting due to shame or fear of disbelief. Sharing his story publicly highlighted that male victimisation is common, and helped other men recognise they too might be in an abusive situation.
Adam — A Sixteen-Year Struggle
Adam (name changed) survived 16 years of coercive control before his partner was convicted in 2025. His journey illustrates how long-term abuse can erode confidence, isolate victims, and create profound psychological harm. Adam’s story also shows the barriers men face when trying to report abuse — fear of disbelief, concern for children, and social stigma — and the importance of documenting incidents, seeking advice, and persisting despite these challenges.
Around two million people in England and Wales experience domestic abuse each year, with men making up a significant proportion.
Surveys show 1 in 3 domestic abuse victims are male, confirming that male victimhood is not rare.
Only about 5 % of domestic abuse service users supported by local services in the UK are men, despite roughly one in three victims being male. This highlights how support often fails to reach men at the same rate as women.
(Source: ONS / Crime Survey for England and Wales)
Male victims are less likely to report abuse, often delaying disclosure due to fear, stigma, or concern for children.
A government mapping report found that 82 % of men said accessing help was “quite or very difficult,” with many noting male-specific services were lacking or unclear in their area.
(Source: Government Mapping Report on Male Victims)